Is it okay to be mad at God?

Is it okay to be mad at God? (submitted and received on May 31, 2019)

Tempers fly. Disappointments happen. Heartbreaks hit. In this human drama which most of us want to avoid, is it okay to be angry with God?

I’ll call this writer “Stephanie” who has an honest response to a post about loss. She writes, “I get mad at God when I hear of a child being murdered or beaten. I get mad at God when a dog is neglected or abused. God can stop these things from happening and doesn't. I know people do these things, but it hurts my heart so much to see these things happening. He could intervene and stop it from happening.”

Yes, God CAN stop these things from happening. As for choices, God chose to be in a relationship with us. He didn’t need this relationship; He chose it. His deepest desire is for us to know and love Him in an eternal relationship. For this to happen, we have to have free will.

Sometimes we make the right choices. Sometimes we do not.

Because we live in a world of free will, our choices can lead to sin—and sin is seen in heinous acts and every day stumbles. Sometimes we bring sin on ourselves and bad things happen as a result of our choices. Sometimes bad things happen to us and to others as a result of other peoples’ choices.

But this doesn’t answer the question of whether or not it’s okay to be mad at God. To be direct, I say that yes, it is okay to be mad at God.

Just don’t stay there.

I was speaking with Rev. Dr. Bonnie Bates, my conference minister yesterday. She says those who don’t get angry with God don’t have a substantial relationship with God. You don’t get super mad at a stranger, she explained, but in an intimate, covenantal relationship with God—in a relationship of love, trust and shared experiences—the truth is yes, you can be angry with God.

Staying angry with God is essentially telling God that He has done something wrong. But God doesn’t do “wrong.” God is God.

As God, our Creator understands when we are angry, frustrated, and disappointed. God knows our hearts. God knows how difficult and painful life in this world can be.

In a 2002 article “Is it ever right to be angry at God?” John Piper says, “If anger at God is in our heart, we may as well tell him so, and then tell him we are sorry, and ask him to help us put it away by faith in his goodness and wisdom.”

While inappropriate anger is sin (Galatians 5:20; Ephesians 4:26-27, 31; Colossians 3:8), I think of Jonah and the Ninevites (Jonah 4). It is not ‘right’ to be angry at God; we can understand this in time; but I think it’s okay to be angry with God.
How long you stay angry with God? Well, that’s another question. To those embedded with deep-rooted anger who have stopped talking with God, don’t “duh” me as I share what is plainly obvious: you are still hurting.

I hurt, too. For me and my deep losses, the hurt does not “go away.” But it does change in the company of God who understands (and stays steady) through my good—and also my not so good—days.

Here’s my bottom line: God gets us. God knows why your heart boils and even breaks. He will listen to you—not matter what you say, or when you say it.